prototype.

What they forget to mention is that being original becomes a struggle. They said every relationship is different, that although your preference remains similar your actions will not. But what they forgot to mention is that they lied. They forgot to tell you that past memories shared with an old flame will be repeated. Pet names that was once meant for one person and one person only is now meant for an array of persons. The smell of your old flame becomes the smell of your new flame; he becomes your favorite smell, just like he had been your favorite smell. Routines get repeated. Morning texts. Goodnight texts. I love you’s. The “I’ll never love somebody as much as I love you.” The exchange of “I’ve never done this before’s.” The exchange of words that break your heart. What they forgot to tell you is that the prototype will never be erased. They forgot to tell you that you will never forget your firsts. That even if you are happy with your new flame that feeling of comparison still lingers. It hides behind their eyes. And when you glance at your new love you see them, and you love them, and what they’ve done for you, to you, because of you is all but generic but when you genuinely look at them you see him. You see the love you wish he could have given you. And then you look into their eyes and you see him.

Notes

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